Goodbye 2016

Well Christmas is done and I hope you had a fabulous time with family and friends.  As the year draws to a close I have a special prayer I want to share with you:

2016 has come and gone and the memories will linger on
If this year has brought pain through mourning and grief
I pray that in 2017 God will turn your mourning into dancing
If the year has brought you heart ache with a loss of relationship
May God bless you in the New Year with new relationships to strengthen your walk
If this year has brought sadness
May you know peace and joy
If the year has brought financial loss
May you know prosperity the way God meant it to be
If the year has been wrought with sickness
May God bless you with healing and good health
If the year has been riddled with weakness
May you know strength in every way
However if this year has brought you health, joy, peace, strength,wisdom and blessing
May you know all these and more in far greater abundance in the year to come!

Happy New year and all the best for 2017!!!!!!

Celebrate and remember

So the holiday season is well under way. I have reached the end of my first week of leave but unfortunately I will have to be back at work for one week before taking the Christmas week off. The break was necessitated by my nephew Daniels 21^st birthday which we celebrated on Monday. It was wonderful to be able to sing happy birthday to him in person this year.

21^st birthday's are always such a wonderful time to reflect and reminisce. I remember all to well seeing him on the day he was born, he was so small and cute. I remember the wonderful times playing with him in the back yard of their home in Roodepoort and oddly one of his first words was, “Outside.”

As the year draws to a close it is always time to reflect on the year that has passed. Sadly Honey's passing was a painful event to deal with but there are other good things to remember and treasure like Topaz arrival amongst other things.

We should never fail to take time to reflect and remember as year draws to a close. It helps us to put life into greater perspective and to know that whether the year has been good or bad, God has been with us all the way.

Mint deep

Well the weekend was uneventful, that is except for the bi-annual mint culling taking place. Mint culling? Yip, I pull out every tiny piece of mint out of the clivia bed that I can see........and there in lies the secret. Why do I take out every piece that I can see? Because the real mint roots are much deeper in the ground and the surface stalks and leaves are just the surface pieces.

Mint survives and thrives but making use of two propagating methods. It spreads roots under ground and the stalks and leaves on top can also become roots if that stalk hits the ground and the plant senses that by putting roots down it will obtain a ground holding position.

That should be a lesson to us in our faith.....we should have deep roots under ground and we should be able to make roots on the surface where they are required to cement our position and help us gain ground.

That speaks to me about having tenacity and courage to stand your ground. Sometimes you can face impossible odds but if you are rooted and grounded in your faith, you will not be moved by the circumstances.

MRI

I had a fall at the beginning of the year which resulted in me needing to get some physiotherapy, which I did. To complete the process though the doctor requested that I have an MRI done. Having had one before and also surviving an apesectomy under local aesthetic, I thought this would be a walk in the park.

Boy was I wrong. I was too casual about it and did not prepare myself for it and to make matters worse this time I had a cage around my head to keep it still. I made it through almost all the scans okay but by the last one I was beside myself and had to take a break and return to have it done again. Luckily the practitioner realized I would do better without the head cage the second time round, which I did.

I must admit in some ways that is how this year has felt, suffocating...... and yet in many other ways, liberating. I have made peace that some things may never come to be and yet at the same time I have full trust in God to do what He has said he would do. Either way, I'll be okay.

When you are feeling pressed on every side it can be really hard to trust God, yet in all things that is precisely what He expects from us. Our unwavering trust in His will and His will alone is what guides us we feel as though we are going off course. That trust will bring us safely home.

Winding down

As the year winds down and the holiday season draws near, it will be wonderful to start finding a little more time for the things I am so looking forward to doing, being creative.  Be it art, gardening, making new Christmas decorations who knows but it will be fun. 

Time for friends and family and time to unwind the mind and body.  Winding down in a necessary part of life and I am asking myself more and more questions about how can I make more down time possible?  This year has had precious little of that. 

God knows my heart though and I know that over time he will give me the wisdom to know when to make small changes and when to make the big ones.  Down time allows me time to connect my spirit to God's and hear what he wants for my life. 

It is only when that focus is clear that I can then turn my attention to ministry, what does God want me to do with this writing gift in the year ahead?  What does God want me to share with you to encourage and uplift you in every way that I possibly can?

Well the answers to all these questions and more will soon be answered when that down time begins!

Tumbling down

This afternoon I was busy with the normal kitchen work, washing dishes, when next thing I hear rattling and crackling and all of a sudden I'm being attacked by boxes and a falling cat...you guessed it, little Topaz getting up to mischief.  She was obviously trying to get to the corner spot which I have now blocked seeing as as the corner is a piece of wood being held in place delicately by some silicone. This is something I have been trying to stop her from doing for some days now, since I noticed the piece starting to fall through.

Well missy got as big a fright as I did and by the look of shock on her face I could tell no reprimand was going to be necessary, she had learned her lesson.  For the rest of the day she has been quite good by comparison....shame!

I suppose the lesson is clear we all get up to mischief from time to time and it is only when things come tumbling down around us that we learn.  Let's try not to learn the hard way, lets learn to listen when God says NO!

It's all very interesting

Humour just has to be one of my favourite things and any time there is some kind of political turmoil you can bet you the jokes will fly.  It is easy for us here in S.A. to take a non emotional approach to looking at the American elections, but we all know in truth that what happens in the USA does not stay in the USA, it affects global markets and the lives of almost everyone. 

Most interesting for me this time round though is reading the articles about the opinion that it is the American evangelical movement that seems to have had the last word in this election.  Being anti abortion myself, I can well understand that more people voted for Trump than Clinton on this one issue alone. 

That being said, I respect Trump as a business man and although he was blowing hot air about a lot of issues at the heart of it, America is a capitalist society and money talks.  People want a leader who will develop the nation financially.  This lesson is one that most South Africans still have to learn and stealing Bill Clinton's campaign theme phrase, "its the economy, stupid."

Back to the church though and its role in this election.  I could not be happier that this is one core outcome that the media are highlighting.  It means that the Church of Christ in America is finally standing up and making themselves heard in a powerful and meaningful way. 

In history, although many nations plundered Africa for its wealth, the one thing that America did right was send missionaries to this continent, lots of them.  I have been personally impacted by this by the very close relationship that our family had in Nelspruit with the Christ family, who were here to do just that, spread the word of God to African people during our nations difficult apartheid years.

This election should give hope to all Christians that they too can make a difference in the politics of their nation if they will stand up and vote....and where you can't vote...Pray!

The start of it all

It was my late fathers birthday in November 2010 that prompted me to start something meaningful.  I wanted to find a way to focus on the positive things of the day rather than focusing on the negative that lead to the beginning of my writing journey, and what a journey it has been.

This year has been tough, certain commitments have taken more of my time than I would have liked, but mostly it was Honey's passing that has been a huge challenge for me.  I have struggled to maintain 'business as normal' for quite some time.  Today is my dad's birthday remembrance once again and my mom reminded us that he would have been 70 this year, a very special age indeed.

It is the first time that Honey will be celebrating with my dad, so I hope they haven't been up to too much mischief but I have opted this year to commemorate the day by making a decision to have a new ring made.  I know it will take some time to come together, i.e. the design, obtaining the stones and then getting the ring made, but it is a positive decision in the right direction that I hope will help me move forward in both remembering my dad and Honey.

And that is of course how it all began, looking for the positive in each new day.  Note I said positive, not happiness or gladness or jumping for joy, just positive.  When we are honest with ourselves even through life's difficulties there are positive things to learn and so today I remind myself again to go back to the roots of my writing.

The last six years of writing have been an amazing journey, but hopefully they are still only the foundation, a building block, of the wonderful things to come!

Control points

One thing you learn quickly in accounting is the value of control systems. Quite frankly the results without them are catastrophic.

Likewise in our faith walk there is a need for controls. When we learn about the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5 we learn about self control. About these fruits the bible says there is no law against them, but what does that mean?

It means that when the fruit of the Spirit are actively working in our lives our boundaries are expanded and we are allowed more freedom in exercising our faith.

If we want more freedom and we want God to be able to trust us, then we have to be willing to allow His fruit to grow in us and become manifest in us on a daily basis. Can I encourage you to do just that?

Just another heat wave

With summer now in full swing the heat waves are hitting hard, especially as we have not had the normal rain fall we are used too. I am longing for those late afternoon thunder storms that cooled off the day.

Longing for and missing the rain has brought with it a flood of emotion with missing my Honey-Bear. I had come to feel that I had moved on and accepted his loss but a flood of emotion has brought it all back.

Longing and yearning aren't new to mankind and David expressed it well when he wrote, “As the deer pants for the water, so my soul longs after you. You alone are my hearts desire and I long to worship you.”

The beautiful difference between longing for rain and longing for God is that unlike longing for rain, where the end is unsure, we can be assured that as we long for God, He indeed can make His presence felt in an instant.

Under seige

To a lot of South Africa's it seems as if our nation is under seige and the sad truth is that they are correct.  It is true, corruption, crime, unnecessary violence plague almost ever aspect of our lives and we really are sick of it.  There is a tide of change that is coming but for the most part it just feels too slow. 

But that is exactly how God's justice works, it is slow, very slow but when God decides to act it is with swift speed.  Why is that?  Well, it is because God wants to give every sinner the opportunity to repent. 

The devil uses all kinds of wicked ways to plunder and destroy, but God in His kindness uses grace and mercy to draw us to Himself.  His seige is one that works through the Holy Spirit, it is soft, it is quiet and peaceful and when we surrender to His love the greatest seige of all is complete, the seige of your heart.

Palony juice

My mother was quick to remind me of another one of my culinary faux pas. I was around 12 and we were living in Nelspruit. It was the Dippie year (story for another blog) and one particular day I wasn't feeling well. I was very, very nauseous. I had figured out somewhere along the line that Marmite helps to deal with nausea. I had taken a big spoon full of Marmite and sucked some off the spoon but just couldn't finish it, so I left the spoon in the fridge.

Something, and to this day I don't know what, had dripped into the spoon, I think it might have been milk. When I next returned for my next lick........yuck, it tasted like palony!!!! In my innocence I yelled, “Who put palony juice in my Marmite??!!” To this day I've never lived that one down. Bwahaha!

There are some mistakes that we make in life that are genuinely innocent. We truly do not understand at the time what it is that we are getting ourselves into. We say or do things that only once committed are seen to be big mistakes. It is easy for us to beat ourselves up about that, but God is a good God, He knows the intent and thoughts of our heart. In situations like that all we need do is show genuine sorrow for our error and He will forgive and forget those things quicker than we can even utter the word, “I'm sorry God!”

If you have faltered in your faith in any way, reach out to God today and ask for forgiveness. His everlasting love is only a heartbeat away.

Supper sucks

I was reminded of my 20's very quickly on Sunday night when I cooked a meal that totally sucked! Quite frankly I should have known better!! Now I'm not going to disclose the nature of my disaster but any rationally thinking human being would have seen that one coming. I think I did too but I was just being to stubborn to admit it.

Quite honestly I don't know how I ever survived my 20's. Most of my meals came from cans and when I did venture to cooking a meal, it often ended up in the bin. Back then the culprit was my heavy hand with salt, hence to this day I seldom cook with salt but prefer to add it in the plate.

Why I was being so stubborn in proceeding down a path I knew would end up in disaster I don't know, but I guess that's the moral of the story. How often in life don't we see our own mistakes staring us in the face before we commit them but we stubbornly proceed by kidding ourselves that somehow we will get a different result.

Eish peeps, let's wise up a little and just think twice before we jump!

Voooops it's gone!

This morning as I got into the elevator at work, my office tag that I hang round my neck got hooked on the elevator rail and slipped out my hand and flung back......and before I could even gasp....vooooops it was gone, down the elevator shaft!  Bwahahaha!

I think to myself, will I get to the end of my life and wonder...my goodness that all went so fast!  That also makes me realize that I really don't want to get to the end of my life wishing that I had done certain things that I could have done.  The time to act is now, no more hesitation. 

We really hesitate so often to truly live life and make the most of things, but we really should not.  Sure we may make some mistakes along the way but I would rather make mistakes while taking risks and achieving something than sitting in a safe zone and hating every minute. 

Come join me will you, let's make this life amazing!

Is it possible?

I ask myself, is it possible to live an ordinary life and still achieve something extraordinary for God?  Well that would probably depend on your definition of extraordinary.  If you are thinking wowzer amazing, out of this world....then you may be disappointed. 

If however you are thinking, extra, as in more of and ordinary, as in normal, then you may be onto something.  That doesn't sound exciting does it?  Lol! Fear not.  Truth is that 'ordinary' ministry is quite exceptional.  Being willing to allow God to work through you when you often feel you have nothing to give but pushing on and giving despite your own fears.....well that is quite exceptional. 

Then being willing to give more of yourself, to give more than your fair share of ordinary ministry and giving with all your heart....well that is something quite extra ordinary isn't it. 

You may think I have nothing much to give, give it anyway and give more and more of just that and your ordinary life truly will be something extraordinary to God!

Discontented

I have been challenged this week about the meaning of contentment.  I must admit that in all honesty I actually don't think I know the true meaning of contentment.  It seems that I am always striving for something more somewhere. 


I started asking myself the question, what is the danger with discontentment?  What I felt inside was anger, regret and frustration.  These are all traps the devil wants to lock us into.  When we are angry and frustrated we lash out at other people and do everything in our power to hurt them because we want them to feel the same pain we are feeling. 

Philippians 4:11 reads, "Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content."  The key word here is learned.  That means that by careful consideration about the things we are discontented about and bringing them to God and asking Him for wisdom as to how to deal with them, we can then learn how to finally surrender those aspects of our lives to Christ and be content that what He teaches is is the path forward.  It is then, in that place, we can be content.  

I pray this week that you will draw near to God and allow Him to teach you, how to be content. 

That's life

I was muttering to myself again that it is 'Piranah week', you know when everyone wants a piece of you and then I drove by the Panorama Cemetery that I pass everyday on my way home.  That used to freak me out but I have become used to it now.  Then I was reminded of the words from the rap song, "Every day above ground is a good day."

The joys, the tears, the stresses and the wonderful moments are all part of what makes up this amazing human experience and although we all wish we could be on holiday year round, that just isn't life.  Life is living each moment and cherishing it for what it means to you, much like grieving reminds me how much I loved my Honey-Bear!

God doesn't want us to run away from the realities of life but to embrace them and realize that they all have meaning and purpose.  I've often caught myself thinking that my 'purpose' is something I still have to accomplish in the future, when in reality it is doing exactly what I am doing right now every day. 

Will you join me in celebrating life in all its wonderful splendour!

Wild at heart

I had forgotten how completely wild kittens really are.  It really takes quite a long time before they settle down and accept and then grow to love affection.  In our spiritual lives it is no different, we come to Christ with no understanding of how to let God love us and it takes time, a very long time to understand and accept His great love.

There is truly nothing greater that we can experience in life than to come to that wonderful realization and know that God has a plan and a purpose for our lives, even when things go horribly wrong.  Believing that God truly does love us, even in the most difficult of times, is a life long journey of growth.

If you are struggling through difficulties right now, don't loose heart and truly set your mind to believe and receive the amazing love that Father God has for you.

Power struggles

Power struggles.........they come in all shapes and forms!  Zuma Vs the Gupta's Vs Madonsela, Clinton Vs Trump, and right here at home I have my own power struggle I'm trying to figure out, Topaz Vs Ginger.  On the one hand it is just playfulness but I can see an element of her wanting the upper hand over him. 

The question is who will win in the end?  Sound familiar in our spiritual lives?  Well it is a struggle that played itself out just over 2000 years ago when Satan took on Jesus.  During Jesus 40 day fast in the desert Satan offered Jesus the world if He would bow to him, but Jesus said NO!  Instead Jesus took the battle to Satan at the Cross and WON! 

The curious thing is that even though Jesus won the battle at Calvary we still have to make a choice every day to connect and become part of that victory for our own lives.  Yes, we only need to confess Jesus as our Lord and Saviour once, but the choice to submit our will to His, is a daily struggle for each of us. 

Little cat of horrors

I never thought a little girl cat could ever be such a feisty little thing.  Her mischief and naughtiness knows no bounds and she is as tough as they come.  Shelter life definitely hardened her up.  Most of the time she is a bit much for Ginger and she drives him crazy.  Hence I have given her the nick name, little cat of horrors.

When she is tired she runs round bashing into things and just becomes a royal handful.  Today with our first proper spring rains she has been particularly difficult to control as she has been locked up for most of the day.  Thankfully late this afternoon the rain stopped so they were able to go outside but it has been very cold so I did not want to leave her out there long.

Feisty, tough, strong, courageous, these are all qualities that God wants us to display in everyday life.  God expects us to grow stronger in dealing with life's difficulties and just deal with things head on as they happen.

I'd like to encourage you to not let life get you down but be strong and courageous in God!

Now everybody to the theme tune from Little shop of horrors.....

Little cat, little cat of horrors, little cat, little cat of horrors, yeeeaaaah!

A little yellow Bishop

I usually find that a short while after having lunch each day I get really sleepy and I'll be working and nodding off at the same time.  Kind of natural and the whole "stomach full, eyes shut" rule kicks in.  I have made it a habit to just take a short walk outside my building to the edge of the one landing areas.

There I find a beautiful tree that is tall enough that the top branches reach over the balcony and if I'm needing a little feel of nature I can grab the leaves and run them through my fingers.  I can usually hear the birds chirping and the winds rustles through the leaves and it is both relaxing and refreshing. 

Today as I stood there I spotted a little yellow Bishop.  He seemed to pay no attention to me and just went about his business, and by his activities, I am guessing that was finding nesting materials.  I stood and watches as he carefully snipped off the leaves on a whole stack of twigs and all you could see was leaves flying.  Unfortunately I did not have enough time to stick around to see if he was actually going to fly off with some twigs, but I think that was obvious. 

Birdies do what birdies are meant to do.  They don't question their own existence, their identity or their purpose, they just get on with it.  Why is it as human beings we are constantly looking for some other plain of existence?  By that I don't mean heaven or parallel universe theories, I mean who we are and what we are meant to do.  We are constantly after better things, more money and a life that is out of our reach.

God gave us each a unique set of skills and talents and with those we are meant serve this world we are created into and do our jobs to the best of our abilities.  When the right time comes in each of our lives God may move us from one place to another, or from one job to another, but if you are still where you are despite your best efforts to move or change, know that God is still busy with a specific work in your life and he needs you to stay there until that purpose in your life is accomplished. 

Trust and rest in Him!

Pull yourself towards yourself

There comes a time after painful events when you just have to get to a point of getting on with life again.  It is a sad fact but life does go on for the living and no matter how much we wish we could just curl up in a cave and die ourselves, that is not what God expects of us.

My dad used to have a saying, "pull yourself towards yourself".  It never made much sense but looking at it now I see how true it is.  Painful events take something from us and we loose a part of ourselves in the process that goes into hiding because we cannot bare to show that part of ourselves to the world at that point. 

Like it or not we have to force ourselves to come out of that place of hiding and deal with life and all its turmoil, but also life and all its joys.  We have to get back to doing the things we love and we have to find a way to open up our hearts again to not only feel joy but love also. 

Remember at all times that, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!"

Miserable nuisance

So setting up my new laptop is taking a bit longer than planned.  It's just not as "user friendly" as the last one.  A minor glitch with the positioning of the " and @ symbols being switched on the keyboard is also a nuisance.  This however is is not the biggest nuisance of my past week.

I've come to expect that it will happen from time to time but when it does it is a real frustration.  Friday morning in traffic, the traffic flow had slowed to a stop when I looked into my rear view mirror, only to see a lady looking down instead of up.  All of my pleas of, "look up, look up" were in vain and smack....she rear ended me.

Luckily it is not a major damage, but I am guessing that the worst case scenario will be the replacement of the bumper, but the biggest problem is that I had taken her cell and email contact details and now she is evading me.  Well I suppose that is the other reason one has insurance these days....let their lawyers sort it out.  I just have to find the money for the excess.

Life's nuisances are just that, a nuisance.  The biggest challenge is managing the anger that comes with it.  Ever fiber in my body wants to hunt her down and take revenge, but that will be allowing playing right into the devil's hands and allow him to have a field day with my emotions.

Well I'm not going to let that happen.  I'm going to take this in my stride and just work through things one step at a time.  By faith and patience this will be resolved and I will give thanks to God in advance for His goodness and kindness.

Back to the earth

For the first time this season and since Honey passed, I was able to get some gardening done today.  It really was amazing therapy as along with him, two of the baby Hibiscus I planted in autumn did not survive the winter so I needed to redo that section of the garden bed. 

Gardening has been a source of healing for me for me for a very long time and getting my hands in the soil really helps me to get connected to my soul and the source of my strength and joy.  As a result I feel more peaceful and relaxed and not stressed at all.

We all have activities in our lives that bring us to our source of strength and help us to reconnect with God.  Have you lost your peace recently?  If so, go back to where you know your soul is the happiest and reconnect with yourself and with God. 

Cheeky very cheeky

Wow!  This little cat of mine is cheeky.  According to my next door  neighbor once her kids arrive home she pops round for a play date with both the kids and her somewhat grumpy Tom cat.  Loki chases her away and she thinks it is part of the game and she comes straight back for more. 

There is absolutely no shortage of boldness and courage in this small fur bundle.  She doesn't care whether you like her or not, she's going to play with you.  I actually wish I had her courage! 

Makes you think though, doesn't it?  How much time don't we waste trying to get people to like us instead of just getting on with life and doing what God called us to do?.....

______________

P.S.  I am experiencing some internet / PC problems at the moment to getting to writing is a bit of a challenge, so please bare with me.

Repeat

I was noticing the other day on FB memories how often it seems to be that I go through similar things at similar times of year.  Sometimes it may be a few years apart, but similar incidents tend to recur or repeat themselves through the years.  The strange thing is that it isn't only linked to our planets physical seasons.

Well that is because spiritual and emotional seasons are also a reality of life.  I wish God had told us more about why this happens but perhaps it is due to our own unique identities and that we all have particular issues that we need to deal with as our own "thorn in the side" that Paul spoke of. 

I think the quicker we accept that this is real the easier it is for us to work through these issues.  I think we need to learn to be grateful that God cares enough about us to give us these wonderful opportunities to grow and learn to flow with the Holy Spirit as He works in our lives. 

A naughty reminder

Last night was Topaz first night in mommy and Ginger's bedroom.  The power had been out earlier in the evening and the two kitties had played up a storm.   I remember Honey and Ginger doing the same thing.  Seeing as they were getting along better I thought it would be a good time to bring her upstairs. 

Boy was she naughty. 

She didn't want to settle down, she kept pouncing on Ginger's bed and eventually the only option was to tuck her into bed with me.  There were a number of movements throughout the night by her and Ginger and I did not get a good nights sleep.  Dealing with all this naughtiness reminded of Honey and Ginger's kitten time and that brought with it some grief today as I thought about Honey and how much I still miss him.  

Tonight however I am reminded that I cannot punish her for being a hyperactive kitten, that is the way God made her, just the same way that God made Honey with his heart and lung condition.  I have struggled to deal with his loss but I was reminded of a story one of my bible school lecturer's told us.  He was an American and felt the call to come to South Africa but had a new young child, when querying God about this call, he clearly heard God say to him, "Don't for one minute think you love your child more than I do."  

I take comfort knowing that God created Honey the same way He created me and therefore his illness and death is as painful for God as it is for me and Honey is safe back in the arms of His creator.  

 

A crazy few months

The last few months have been rough in various ways.  My regular domestic worker went on maternity leave, leaving me back to square one with little help but that was partly my fault.  Honey's passing in June hit me really hard and now introducing Topaz to my home has been stressful as well, but the right thing to do.  There have been other pressure points as well.

Stress and pressure really force us to evaluate our priorities and see what is important to us and make decisions accordingly.  Topaz was one such decision.  For me the joy of having cats is watching them play together. 

Finding our source of joy is not just an emotional journey but a spiritual one as well.  Joy is supernatural, it carries us when nothing else can and pulls us through.  

Scripture tells us that the joy of the Lord is our strength.  To me the joy of Lord is knowing that I am living in His will and doing what He wants me to do, for the season he wants me to do it for.

What is your source of joy?

Kitten's first week

Well I must admit the first 2 days of baby Topaz arrival left me wondering if I had made the biggest mistake of my life.  Ginger treated the little thing like a total abomination.  From day 3 however I started seeing small glimpses of a change in Ginger's attitude and behaviour.  Thankfully a good work colleague sent me a mail (Thanks Eldorette) that helped me really understand what was going on in Ginger's mind and that really helped.  She said that it was all about trust and that Ginger needed learn that he could trust the baby's presence.  By day 5 mutual play times were starting to form and he is now far more comfortable, although developing affection for her still will take time. 

That really makes me think.  We do exactly the same thing in an office environment and even a strong social circle.  All new people are treated at arms length.  I remember learning about the forming, storming, norming and performing phenominon so animal behaviour is much like our own. 

Do we do that in our relationship with God though?  That would be hard for me to say as I have walked with God since childhood, so I have never learned what it means to have God be a "new" part of my life.  I do however know what if feels like to feel like you are being forced to go to church...and no, not by my parents, by myself and my own church attendance habits.  I think I have finally found a balance that makes me feel that my own needs are met as well as God's. 

Cat guardians

Well I'm supposed to be on leave but I've never been so stressed before. Trying to settle in a new kitty and especially a shelter cat is proving to be an enormous challenge and I'm exhausted. My biggest fear right now is that I might have done Ginger a disservice but from what other people are telling me it is going to take time, which is a commodity I just don't have. It would have been easier to get to new kittens again at the same time....sigh! But my new baby Topaz is really beautiful and somewhere deep down I know I've made the right choice, I just have to find a way to make it work.

I don't for a second regret getting Honey and Ginger when I did and now that Honey has passed I know I needed a new kitty that was as affectionate as he was and Topaz certainly is affectionate. One of the reasons that I am so in love with Cats though is that once they get to know you they really understand what you need emotionally and often physically too.

The other day I had a now rare migraine after eating some potato salad that must have been made with some form of dairy. I came home and immediately crashed into bed. Ginger came and slept with me through the whole ordeal. When I woke up I could see he was actually just lying quietly next to me waiting for me to resurface. Cats are amazing guardians and it does not surprise me that the Egyptians believed them to be the guardians of the afterlife.

As Christians we have other amazing guardians as well. Firstly our angels and they are more present with us than we realize. Then there's the Holy Spirit who stands guard over our spirit as we navigate through life. We could not be blessed with better care than the Angels and Spirit of God himself, so we should never fear what tomorrow holds.

Rushed pruning

On voting day, 3 August, I was walking through the garden when I spotted some buds on the blackberry.  I decided that some rushed pruning needed to be done.   Normally I prune in late autumn but last spring I didn't get a good crop so figured I would try pruning in late winter and see what works best. 

Pruning is such a necessary part of the gardening process and if it isn't done each year plants will actually die off or not grow to their full potential.  Interestingly enough it is sometimes not only dead branches that need to be pruned but live growing branches as well.

If used correctly the live cut branches can be used as slips and planted directly into the ground to grow new plants. 

Cutting away the dead parts of our spiritual lives is necessary as well but often we need to cut from our living spiritual matter to give life elsewhere.  We may feel that we don't want to do that but in later years we will certainly see the benefits of that life that we gave when mature Christians around us can attribute their own growth directly to our gift of life.

I encourage you to give life today!

Preparations

Well preparations for the new baby's arrival are now well under way and part of that got me thinking that it won't be fair for Ginger to have a nice burger bed and not Topaz. I headed back to the store and to my disappointment they were sold out (and I checked two branches).  I did however see another bed I liked that had a wider opening but higher roof.  I figured the opening could be closed by draping a small blankie over it and that should work.  Well I was right, Ginger took one look at this and was delighted.  I think he likes the "stretching" room it allows him.

So Princess Topaz will be getting the burger bed and bunch of other nice goodies to settle her in so I should be able to start preparing the "baby room" soon.  I am hoping that I won't need to keep her confined for too long but we'll have to take things at her pace.

Sometimes things don't work out the way we want them too but  rather better than expected.  In our faith that is no different so when things don't work out quite the way you planned it might be a good idea to go with the flow and allow God to direct you to the solution He wants for your life. 

Read me

So today I took a days leave to get my car serviced as I have it done privately and it's a bit far from home.  I had some time to kill so I decided to walk through Exclusive Books.  Wow!  I'm surrounded by literally thousands of books and I ask myself the question, why should or would anyone read anything I write?  I am reminded how grateful I am that anyone bothers :-)

Well I would hope that my frank and honest writing would strike a chord with your humanity but more that you would see through my joys, sadness, failures and successes that being a Christian is not about attending church on Sundays but that it runs deep within the chore of the human experience.

There isn't a day that goes by that I don't ask myself the question, what am I doing here?  Why do I exist in the form that I do, i.e. human and what is my purpose in life? 

Well simply put, it is because God decided it would be so and that my sole responsibility is to worship Him for that!  

We are what we are because He first said it.........

I am what I am!

Goldilocks and the three beds

Well Saturday was another heart breaking day for me. Going to an animal shelter is just shattering to see all those beautiful animals that need love and homes, so I am appealing to you that if you are able and allowed, please adopt a fur baby, they really do need us....but I'm not going to dwell there, action will follow. I have chosen my new fur child but still await final confirmation on the adoption and the shelter owner has been a bit busy to get back to me personally today.

Ginger's antics never cease to amuse me and after a very short but cold walk after work I could tell he was looking for a nesting spot. Well we tried bed option 1, not acceptable. Bed option 2, nope something just didn't quite feel right.....but I was getting love meows, like OK you're getting warmer. Then I figured it out and out came bed option 3....aaaah! The little guy curled up inside and hasn't been out since and its been a few hours already...tee hee! Shame he must have really been cold, today's weather has been horrid.

The last two months have been torture on my soul and like Ginger I really just want to find a space and a place where I can feel “warm and loved” and just feel like everything is going to be okay again. I long to just be in a place again where “Holy Spirit” ministry is the norm and where the presence of God is felt in a tangible way. To hunger and thirst after God is a precious thing and I know that in due season, God will bring me back to His place of rest and back to the still waters of refreshing.

Anticipation

There are two things chowing my time at the moment and making it difficult for me to find the time to write, which I am finding very frustrating.  1st being that my dishwasher is not working properly which requires a pre-rinse and 2nd being a very needy cat. 

So although I had wanted to do my ceiling insulation straight after the car service, a new dishwasher is going to have to take priority.  Car service will be sorted next week so it shouldn't take too long to get the dishwasher after that.

Now about the needy cat.  Although I know I am still grieving for Honey, Ginger is experiencing his own challenges.  He is lonely with no one to play with during the day and he doesn't seem to be finding a surrogate family in the complex, so I have decided that it is time to look for another kitty.  After much anticipation I am hoping that I will find one at a shelter that I am going to on Saturday.  I have decided to get a young female, so depending on whether she has been sterilized yet or not, I might have to wait a short while longer, but at least I will have found one. 

So I suppose I am asking for prayer that God will lead me to the right little lady to bring into my family and be a friend to Ginger.  That reminds me of the old hymn, "What a friend I have in Jesus" and I suppose that means that God created all creatures for companionship.  We can know that in the Lord we not only have Jesus to count on but the many wonderful brothers and sisters in Christ that He will bring into our lives. 

Charge

Last night on Ginger's walk I decided to play a game with him and I walked ahead and hid behind the bushes.  When he came round I jumped out with a "boo".  Well the little guy got such a fright and ran away that I thought he did not like the game.

That was until our return walk when suddenly out from the bushes I got charged by a kitty!  Lol!  He figured it out after all.

Well does God have a sense of humour?  He most certainly does that's why he gave us children and animals.  They make us laugh at their silliness and playfulness.  Not only that but I know we have all been through situations that are so funny we know God is at work in that moment. 

Yes there is a time for mourning but there also times of laughter and we can celebrate the good and funny times with God!

In prison

I'm challenged today to read Philippians again and as I do so I'm reminded that he did so from a prison cell.  Yet in spite of this condition he writes the  most inspiring works and so thoroughly useful that they have remained in the Canon of Scripture for thousands of years.

Many of us may find ourselves in prison.  In prison of a marriage that has gone bad, in the prison of a job we hate, in the prison of sick bodies or sick minds... whatever it is, you feel trapped with no way out. 

Then let us remember Paul and  his message, that whatever state I am I can choose to find contentment and peace in Christ, knowing that He who began a good work in me will complete it. 

Today have faith in God and trust and believe in God that you are exactly  where you are supposed to be right now!

Bizare nocturnal activity

Well to cut a long story short, in January I fell down some stairs at work and hurt myself.  I had major challenges getting the fund to pay for the medical attention I needed so I eventually gave up.  Some time later though I took up the fight again and told them that I at least wanted a medical checkup to ensure there was no damage. 

Meanwhile back on the ranch I was getting major head aches but as I have been a long time migraine sufferer I figured it was just the migraines acting up again and didn't pay it too much attention.  Needless to say on Tuesday when the checkup was due, I had a headache from hell and had actually told my boss that if I did not have the appointment in the afternoon I would have gone home. 

So the doc turned out to be an orthopedic surgeon and not a physio as I had expected.  He asked me a few random questions before sending me off for x-rays.  Well that really showed me where the injury was as putting my head back and chin up was excruciating. 

He prescribed a simple soft neck brace, pain killers and some Valium to sleep better.  Mmmm now I usually don't need any help in the sleep department but I took them anyway.  Ha, I woke up the next morning to find my sunflower seeds (my usual bed time snack) sprawled all over the bed....Lol!

I hoped the second night would go better but when I woke up this morning I could have sworn I ate something in the middle of the night, but going down to the kitchen later I found no evidence of any abnormal extracurricular nocturnal activity..............

That was until I arrived home and opened the container in which I had placed my fish cakes that I had grilled the night before.  Would you believe it, but two pieces were missing and the box was covered in my favourite sweet chili sauce..........bwahahahahaha!  Needless to say I don't think I'll be taking the Valium tonight.


In our spiritual walk we can sometimes find ourselves doing some strange things.  If we examine the situation though we will usually find that there has been some outside force/influence that is affecting our mood, behaviour or actions.  If you don't need them, I'd say rather cut them out and let life be.

Now should I strap myself to the bed tonight or not???  Teeheehee!

Can we touch him?

This weekend on one of Ginger's walks we were joined by some very young children whom I could see had not had any contact with cats before. Oh boy, were they scared! It took quite a bit of coaching for me to get them to approach slowly and gently to allow Ginger to settle down near them until they could touch him....and oh how soft he was!

The two little ones fired away a stack questions about cats and of course I was only to happy to oblige. But you know what? So many people have no idea how to approach God! When they first come into relationship with Him everything is strange and weird and they are unsure of how to connect with and communicate with God but more importantly they don't know how to touch God and be touched by Him.

That is what the church is there for, for us to educate and teach people how to come to God, build a relationship with Him and to learn how to walk in beautiful union with Him. As the body of Christ we are His hands and feet and the most important contact any human being will have to God.

Ever present

As the days have turned to weeks and now into over a month since Honey passed, I have found myself frustrated that the world just does not stop turning. All I have wanted was an extended time alone to deal with my sadness, but unfortunately life just does not do that. The world keeps turning and if we want to survive we have to turn with it.

I have been confused by Ginger's response. Although I have noticed a change in some of his behaviour he seems to just keep going on with life as normal and more importantly he enjoys every second of play time and walking together. My vet did help me understand that animals will miss a companion but that they do not feel heart ache in the same way we do.

Ginger is ever present in every moment and that has been a great example to me. He reminds me that in life and in faith we have to be present in the here and now, not living in the past, not living in the future but here now.

Mouth of babes

On the back of my grumbling about going to church on Sunday and then enjoying the service, the exit from the car park proved to be quite hilarious.

I was backing out really slowly as there was a family with a little girl right next to me and I wanted to make sure that I did not hurt anyone.  My window was down when the little one declared in afrikaans, "Jy moet altyd weer kom!" (You must always come again!)

Well I giggled all the way home at God's humorous reminder not to neglect my Sunday church attendance. 

Heeheehee!

A lesson from Barnabas

I'll admit that I had to drag my feet to go to church this morning and leave Ginger at home as I absolutely hate spending time apart from him now.  This mornings message however was one I really needed to hear.  Trevor Hudson is a regular preacher at Mosaic and I love his good old fashioned Methodist preaching.  

Today Trevor preached about Barnabas and what an amazing impact this seldom discussed man had on the early church and that his primary gift was that of being an encourager.  Barnabas played a key role of encouragement in both the lives of Paul and Mark and if it had not been for his ministry and encouragement in their lives, they may well not have contributed to the writing of the gospels in the way they did.  

In the backdrop of life and the difficulties we face it can be really hard to stay positive, especially if like me you are dealing with grief.  In my own life I have seen this play out in the world of my writing as over the past 6 years I have been open about writing through my difficult moments.  Rather than building walls around us we should be building bridges that help to connect people to each other and God.  We need to learn to have open conversations with people and be able to give them affirmation and appreciation. 

Walkies

Every day now since Honey has passed I have been taking Ginger out for walks to our complex park as he is a little more hesitant now to venture out on his own.  Tonight I went to art group and really wanted to skip that part of the routine, but Ginger was having none of it.  He meowed my ears off until I relented and took him out. 

Although I freeze every time, it really is good for me too as seeing him happy is helping me move forward.  It is not going to be easy but I want to try and find other ways to express my grief rather than crying all the time.  Crying is good to a point, but it is totally draining and leaves me feeling depressed and I really believe that Honey would not have wanted that.  He existed in my life to be my companion and I know that if he could talk to me know he would tell me that he wants me to be happy.

Scordatura

Scordatura - A latin word meaning "to bring into agreement or tune," but also the name of a short experimental film that my nephew, Daniel Bate, had a hand in making.  This was part of his course at AFDA film school in Durban and our family had the pleasure of watching it at the schools third year experimental film festival on youth day.

It was a tale brilliantly told, if I say so myself (no, I'm not biased), but seriously it was really, really good!  The real kicker is that the entire story was told without dialogue, but the imagery and music told the chilling tale of a young woman who was murdered by her possessive boyfriend/husband.

Now I could complain about the fact that our film industry just has way too much violence in it, or I could be grateful that this short film showed in a chilling way the consequences of relationships that go bad and more importantly it highlighted the major problem of the fact that many, many woman are killed by the hands of their partners, which is an extension of our abusive society.

I truly believe that Daniel has a wonderful film career ahead of him and my prayer is that he will use his amazing God given talent to further the kingdom of God and tell the stories that need to be told.

When the heart weighs a ton

I arrived home from my weeks holiday in Durban yesterday, but I have never felt so torn when returning home.  I left behind my mom and family and I miss them dearly and the normal joy of seeing my babies was broken knowing that I now only have one little man to come home to.  I'm so delighted to be with Ginger, but the grief of losing his brother still weighs so heavily on my heart and more so when I am at home with Ginger. 

In some ways I think animals are born selfish and for the most part I think Ginger is only too happy to have me all to himself, but there are a few times when I do hear a distinct sadness in his meow and then I know he is missing Honey too.  They both played so boisterously together.  I am finding it hard to adjust to the new home routine as Ginger definitely demands more of my time in play and walks for exercise.

I guess I am learning what the empty nest syndrome feels like and I feel such guilt at grieving Honey when I still have one very beautiful baby with me. 

I can only pray that the Holy Spirit will comfort me with His love and support me through this major change of life that I am going through now.  I am praying that in the days ahead I will have the strength to celebrate life's beauty one again. 

Goodbye Honey-Bear

It has been 2 weeks now since I had to bid a sad farewell to my darling kitty Honey-Bear!  His passing was sudden as I had no idea that he was even sick but the little guy had been fighting both a heart and lung condition.  His departure left me totally shattered as I had no time to prepare to say goodbye. 

His beautiful life started in May 2005 when he was born to a stray kitty who had made herself home in my friends home.  Honey and Ginger have been my companions, friends and children for 11 years so far and Ginger and I miss Honey dearly.  More than that though I have enjoyed a bond with Honey that I have had with no other animal. 

Honey has been the only cat that has ever allowed me to look deeply into his eyes which is something cats never do as part of their survival instinct.  He allowed me to give him loving glances which was returned in his own way.  He allowed me to hug and cuddle him regularly and I miss holding his chubby little frame in my arms.

As I have released my darling cat into the arms of my heavenly father I believe my little man will be waiting for me when I eventually arrive in heaven myself. 

Until then it is farewell my little huggy cuddly Honey-Bear!  Mommy misses you my darling!

Opening stuff up

I have developed a small fetish for solar jars and luckily for me, Pick n Pay has been selling a cute little jar for a relatively good price.  To my disappointment though the one unit wasn't working and I had almost thrown the lid away when a hunch told me to hang on to it and open it up sometime.  That I did this weekend.

To my delight what I figured out is that the light itself is still working it was the battery that was the problem which I didn't expect to find in a new unit. The challenge there was that I didn't have a rechargeable battery with me, but I decided to try a regular battery in the mean time and ....walla!  It worked.  Now I know that all I need to do is to try and find a rechargeable and it will be back solar power again.

When we allow God to open us up and expose our inner workings we go through much the same process.  We are able to figure out what works and what doesn't.  This weekend God has in His sovereign way shown me that He deeply cares for the desires I have in my heart and that He is indeed working through a process in my life and guiding me.  I am thankful tonight that I can place my trust fully in Him and I encourage you to open your heart to God and do the same. 

Back to white

Mmppf!  So my current art project bombed out.  I want to repaint a tiger cub I've done before and hang it in the living area.  I thought it would be nice to get the background colour to match most of the decor I currently have but I think I painted it too light and it clashed with the colour of the cubs fur.  The only option seems to be to go darker or change the colour entirely.  After the frustration, the fun part is that I am working on wood, so 3 coats of white paint later....I can start again. 

Starting over on any project in life can be frustrating, but it can also be liberating, you feel a bit like a kid smashing down the Lego blocks to start a new shape.  I've always imagined that this is what God did with our own beautiful planet.  Don't like the Dinosaurs....grab a marble and sling it to earth...oops sorry that was an giant asteroid, Lol! 

God is the ultimate creator and He put that ability in us too, we just need to tap into that and use His creative nature in everything we do.  In our careers we have the opportunity to use the best parts of our skills to worship God, so let us apply God's great creative gifts to ensure that our lives represent the best of Him. 

The curious tale of the Mountain Hard Pear tree

If you visit the Walter Sisulu Gardens in Roodepoort as I did with good friends this weekend, you will come across a leaned over tree with poles propping it up.  The plaque tells the tale of what precisely happened to the tree.

It reads, "Many years ago this tree was struck by lightning which caused great damage to it.  In time the tree healed itself as best it could, creating "bridges" of living wood around the dead parts in the middle.  Now that the dead wood is decaying, it can no longer support the weight of the tree.  As a result it has begun to lean over."

In life we will get struck by lightning/disaster one way or another, but we can choose to give up or we can choose to heal ourselves as best we can and move on.  This does not mean that we won't have scars as a result of our difficulties, but does mean that others will be able to see the result of our positive choices. 

When we take our disasters and pain to God, He will heal us and he will also be our support so that we can continue to live full and happy lives.  The choice, however, to live or die remains in our hands, what will you choose?

Diverted

My morning started out with what has become normal, an accident on the highway. This time though I was fortunate enough to still be in the suburbs, so I managed to duck left onto a route that wound through the suburbs but ended up getting me on the highway much quicker than if I had tried to access the highway behind the accident.

In life we are often faced with diverts. We may have planned our initial route but life throws us a curve ball and before we know it, we have to make a quick decision, duck left or go straight? That is when it is important for us to know our end destination and where we want to go to. If your destination is clear you can make choices that will easily assist you to find your way when trouble strikes, but if you are rigid and unclear, you could end up getting stuck in a place you don't want to be.

When we place our faith in God's plan for our lives we realize that only God sees the full picture of how things will work. We know that He is in control and so “trucks on the highway” don't sidetrack us from where we need to go. Trust in God's plan for your life, though we don't see it, it truly is perfect.

Besties

I always take great delight in spending time with one of my best friends, Bridget. Our friendship has spanned the decades that I have been here in Jo'burg although Bridget has lived outside of South Africa for many years now. Her visits here to see her family are always special and I treasure every moment we spend together.

The important thing here is that although continents now separate us the foundation of our friendship is strong and though we may only see each other once or maybe twice a year, the communication we have is genuine and I suppose it helps that I write my blogs so she is updated on the events of my life as they happen.

That is what our relationship with God is like. We may only truly 'see' or hear from God occasionally (and I think it is only for our own good that He sometimes is silent) but the relationship we have is real and can be trusted no matter what happens. If there is one thing we can count on, it is that God will be our best friend for life!

Shoobee doobee oh loobee

Shoobee doobee oh loobee

Shoobee doobee oh loobee

Shoobee doobee oh loobee

Wha papa doopa pa wha bam bam

????????????????? Confused? Lol! Let me back it up a little!

One of our news headline stories got me all riled up! I figured I'd write about it as it had a good story line and I could have made a great point with it....problem was...it just left me feeling depressed...and I didn't need that!

Instead I chose to focus on my evening chores and one of my favourite things to do is just to hum sing and make joyful noise. Sometimes its praise, sometimes it is worship and other times it is just a silly little ditty like shoobee doobee.

What does shoobee doobee achieve? Well it has me bopping along all happy and I just forget about the cares of the day and that is exactly as it is supposed to be. We can be stronger than any negative news we may have heard or received on any given day because we can choose to rise up, hold our head up and praise God no matter what circumstances life throws at us!

Night ya all! Shoobee doobeeee oh looooobeeee, wha papa doopa paa, pa wha bam bam!

Don't stop now

When we came to the realization this year that we were going to be in drought for a good portion of the summer I decided it would be best to recycle my dish washing water to the garden. For me that is rather simple as my counter top dishwasher drains into the basin, so putting a bucket there would make this easy.

Well I not only saved my two existing hibiscus, they flourished with the extra water. I dare say the extra nutrients from the washed a way food bits helped as well. I was starting to get tired of this chore though and had considered stopping when I realized that winter is here and that we won't be getting much rain from now until spring again. So I got stuck in again this weekend with doing this chore. It might be my imagination, but I don't think so, but I dare say my plants are enjoying the support once again.

Well scripture encourages us along the same lines, for doesn't Galatians 6:9 tell us, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” In life we need to remember to keep on doing those things that at times might seem to be tedious but we know produces good fruit in our hearts and minds and help those around us.

Pack hunting

After a week of being locked up downstairs at night, I decided over the weekend that I would let the kitties decide for themselves where they wanted to sleep. I think it was on Saturday morning that the little guys decided at 2am that they wanted to go out again, so I was happy to oblige.

My body has become used to the 4am routine so I actually woke up then by myself and decided to check on them. I opened the door and called and called but no response. Then I saw two little figures pack hunting something around the flower pots just off my patio. I called a few more times but they ignored me flat. Figuring they were having fun I decided to leave them to hunt and head back to bed.

Have you ever wondered why God is sometimes silent? Well I figure there are times when He would want to chat to us but when He arrives He finds us “having fun” or just plain doing well and He figures he'll leave us be to get on with things. When our hearts are right before God, I think He knows we will turn to Him when we are ready for His companionship and He is happy to oblige.

What a weekend!

I could not have asked for a better May day weekend! We got off work a bit earlier so I headed straight for Lifestyle Nursery. Oh boy what a surprise awaited me! There were baby hibiscus going at a real good price as as well as a special offer on lavenders and I had been wanting both. Needless to say I left with 4 hibiscus and 3 lavender and that meant only one thing....I was going to be gardening the whole weekend long. Pure bliss!

I already had a few packs of herb seed that I had bought the month before and I had seedlings and slips that were ready to plant as well. To get them all in meant that I would have to finish the garden bed layout, which I managed to do as well. I could not be happier with the progress made in one short weekend!

After many months of really slow progress so much changed in 3 short days! You know what? I've realized that this is often the way God works, well at least in my life but you may have seen the same thing. I think God delights in working in our lives in this way as this means that He gets all the glory. I could not have achieved this without so many factors coming together at the same time that this could only have been God's plan all along.

It is not the first time this has happened this month. I needed new boots and I managed to find just the right pairs for this season in my life, all meeting difficult criteria: height; heel type; colour; price...all just right.

I think God is reminding me of something I have believed for a long time.....God loves to move suddenly! It can seem as if our plans are falling apart or just not getting anywhere and then at one moment, swoosh, God moves and everything is sorted! All it takes is patience and faith!

A weeks worth

Every spring I do a serious clean out of the side garden of every inch of mint that I can find and then I lay the fresh compost and sprinkle seeds of whatever I'm in the mood for that year. I always wonder if it will grow back...tee hee! This past year it was parsley that I wanted. I had planted the Basil-Mint as well.

Wow, only a few weeks later you'll find the whole section beaming with new growth. Right now I am able to cut an entire bowl full of herbs each week and it hardly makes a dent....wonderful. Mint, basil-mint, parsley, rosemary, thyme...all get cleaned and sterilized before use and my goodness what a difference those herbs make to salads, tuna sandwiches and meals in general and the flavour lingers long after. Whether from slips or seeds, herbs are so easy to grow and if you don't have much space you can grow them in pots, bottles and tins, there is no need to go without.

Our relationship with the world should be a bit like being a herb. We should easily grow and when others have been in our presence the effect of that connection should linger long after. Admittedly there are times when this is hard to do due to issues we are working through in our lives, but by enlarge we should make a positive impact on the world around us.

Freedom day 2016

Today is freedom day in SA and how nice to have a public holiday on a Wednesday!  I'm reminded again of how incredibly fortunate we are to have the freedom to worship our God without any restriction or persecution. 

There are still many places around the world where this freedom is not guaranteed, so today let's just take a short opportunity to remember this and remind ourselves to keep these countries in our thoughts and prayers and to pray for the Christians in that country to be kept safe. 

BCT

Last week was one of the most exhausting I've had in a very long time.  I was really struggling, so by Wednesday I decided after a trustees meeting that I needed an early night.  I had the lights down low and the kitties were settled and I felt as if I was all set to have a fabulous nights sleep. 

NOT!  On this precise evening midnight struck and my kitties awoke with a vengeance of energy.  I got pounced on until I had no choice but to let them out.  And guess what, it was the first night of our recent cold snap.  Feeling sorry for my little munchkins I thought I could not leave them out all night so I set my alarm for 2am, upon which time I once again dragged myself out of bed to let them back in.  The kitties were grateful and both decided to snuggle in with me under the covers, so I thought that I at least now had a shot of sleeping through till six. 

NOT!  5am the little monsters woke me up once again to be let back out..........Aaarrrggghhh!  My night was ruined.  Needless to say Thursday was a drag and when I eventually got home action needed to be taken as a repeat of the night before was not going to be tolerated.  I made a snug cat cave downstairs in the spare room and locked the little guys up for the night and aaaaahhh!  Sweet peaceful sleep.  I call this treatment 'Behaviour correction therapy'.  One night of no mommy and they settle back into the normal routine, which granted still has me woken up at 4-5 in the morning, but at least it is only once.

So what is God's behaviour therapy with us when we sin?  Well we are caught in a lie and are forced to own up.  We catch ourselves been rude and harsh to someone for no reason and the guilt gets to us.  We yell at someone we love and then we feel the pain of disappointment.  Through it all though if we look into the eyes of father God, what will we see?  Love, forgiveness and grace and a peace that transcends understanding and the knowledge that we can do better.

F.E.A.R – Stay focused

Most of us have heard the acronym for fear, false evidence appearing real and we attribute that to really dire stressful situations where we are lead astray by the lies of the devil. But do you know that fear can take over in the less dramatic, but still rather important decisions we need to take in life?

There are some decisions that I trying to work through and instead of being absolutely clear as to what needs to be done, I have been clouded by emotions about things that pale in significance to the bigger picture. Am I clear about the end result? No, not yet, but the process is clear and undeniable.

That is what our faith walk is all about, looking ahead, seeing the challenge that lies before you and having the courage to go for it any way. So if you are in the same boat today I want to encourage you to never give up, stay focused and don't let the devil distract you from your path.

Split the baby

Shjoe people can be complicated and I'm dealing with a situation in our complex that is getting rather difficult to figure out how to handle. It made me think about the story of Solomon and the two woman fighting over the baby. Solomon the wise knew that if he threatened them both with cutting the child in two that the real mother would do anything to save her baby.

Wisdom can be so hard to find at times and that is why we have to rely on collective wisdom so this time I'm glad there's a trustees meeting coming up so that we can decide on this one together.

When making decisions in life we need to keep the people that are close to us and in our inner circle as part of that process. This being said though we should choose those people carefully. The right people will always give you the right advice, even when it is hard for them to do so.

The plan

I'm a planner and even though I do not always crack it 100% of the time, I get it close more often than not.  The garden reshaping is done and now I'm waiting anxiously for pay day so that I can finish off the last major planting before autumn ends and winter kicks in, although this year I will try to compost throughout the winter.

I am busy planning my children's church class for next week and stressing that I won't finish on time, but I've got my ideas that I am pondering on and need to put the lesson together.  I am planning the wardrobe needs for winter and where I need to spend some money.  Yes, planning is an important part of life and vital if you ever want to achieve any goals. 

That does leave me thinking about what I have planned next for my own spiritual growth and oops, right now, nothing.  That situation has to be changed.  You see if we expect spiritual growth in our lives then this too needs to be a planned event. 

God planned our salvation meticulously and we owe it to Him to spend just a little time focused on planning our journey with Him. 

Hang ups

Our finance team's part of the audit is slowly coming to a close.  It has been a rough couple of weeks and now it is time to catch up with "business as usual".  We are experiencing a few hang ups that are making it a bit challenging.  We are all in the same boat though so there is nothing you can do but be supportive and plough through. 

It is a season that has left me feeling a bit brain dead most days, today being one of them, so I'll admit writing today is challenging.  I do ask myself though, without challenges to overcome, what would life be?  It is precisely all of these challenges that make the measure of the man...or woman.  Our true character is pushed to the surface. 

There are times when that brings joy, but there are also times when that can bring pain because what lies beneath the surface may not be the true characteristics that God desires us to display as children of God.  What it does do though is it forces one to be real and honest with yourself and that can only be good. 

These are the times that bring the most growth and when you see changes within yourself that bring a positive result, it is so rewarding.  God desires that we constantly grow, not only in our relationship with Him and others, but more importantly with ourselves.  As we work through the challenges of life we learn our own strengths and are then able to function more effectively in those strengths in the future.

The long and windy road

Today I will share a tale of protection and hope you won't mind the slightly longer than usual blog, but please stick with me as what I am sharing today could save your life. 

Monday evening was a difficult one.  As I came out of the office and headed along Rivonia towards the highway I could tell something was wrong.  The Witkoppen intersection was grid locked and it was impossible to get through. It was then that I heard on the radio that there had been a major accident blocking the highway. 

It was too late for me to divert on to Witkoppen so I changed lanes and went straight across instead of trying to join the highway.  Trying to figure out my options I decided to try something I hadn't done before.  I took the first right after the highway and figured I would try to "follow my nose" and try and stick as close to running parallel along the route. 

For the first short while I was enjoying the meandering but I did start to get a little scared, that was until I came over a hill and I was able to see the beautiful sunset before me and I could see which way was west..... the direction of home.  After much meandering I eventually popped up in Olivedale and from there I knew my way.

It was about half way through my misadventure that I remembered what had happened that morning.  I had been running late but felt God say, "There is a reason I am slowing you down today.  Today I am keeping you back to avoid a major car accident."  To be sure I repeated the words out loud and then prayed a prayer for protection.  I hopped in my car and headed for work.  I did pass a few minor incidents along the road, but nothing unusual so the mornings events slipped my mind...that was until the evening.  God had slowed me down that morning deliberately so that I would arrive late and need to work late, thus missing the evening accident.  I have absolutely no doubt that if I had left work the normal time, I would have been in the thick of things. 

I have a ability to hear God's voice around motor accidents, specifically because I have been in several accidents before one of which I believe could have been fatal under other circumstances and through this I have learned to discern God's voice specifically in these situations.  Each time that I "missed" His warning I learned to repent and ask Him to make me more sensitive and that is what happened on Monday.

I believe God can do the same every one of us, He can keep His Word and give His angels charge over us.  We need to learn to discern God's voice and know when to apply the right prayer at the right moment to activate God's guardianship over our lives. 

If you have any questions that you would like to have answered about this, kindly write to me at: GWG.Ronwyn@gmail.com. 

Modems Aaarrrgh! Time for plan B

I really wanted an early start to the evening with regards to getting my computer work done, in fact I worked my entire schedule around it today, and what happens??????  Problems with my modem....or something like that.  After over an hour of putting the sim into this device and that device and a few very frustrating phone calls, I finally put the sim into my very old plug in modem.......and for now at least I can work....but I'm not a happy camper. 

That's life though.  Just when I was actually wondering what I was going to write about tonight because, well the weekend was kind of blaah, this happens...a little trouble but then again a little colour into the weekend..mainly RED, angry RED.  Lol!  Well word to the wise, don't throw away your old gadgets too quickly.

The best laid plans go sidewards and well I probably won't get as much personal 'work' done, but knowing there is at least a 'plan B' available, does give some comfort.  In our spiritual lives and routine we need that plan B as well.  What if you can't get to church on Sunday, do you at least have a way to find a quiet time and time to reflect on the things of God before you go back to the hustle and bustle of the work week?  I do, my back stairs with a cup of coffee :-)   We need those backup plans to keep us spiritually alive, don't skip your time with God, just find another way to do it. 

Changing plugs

If there is one thing I will be forever grateful for, it is the fact that my father taught me how to change a plug.  My goodness you open a box these days and there are two prongs everywhere and for some bizarre reason they make some the nasty way with that big round plastic thingie that stops it from fitting into a multi-plug adapter. 

Now before you become impressed with my DIY prowess I might like to add that it can take a good 20-30 minutes to do said plug change. 

We pass skills on to the next generation by conscious thought or by simple behaviour.  The big question is, what do we pass on about our faith?  Our children learn who God is and how God operates from us and our lifestyle.  Let's try to make the choice to make that a positive influence.

Different as knight and day

Sunday's children's church had me totally befuzzled :-) Tee hee!  In the first service we had a bunch of total live wires and I struggled to keep up.  Second service went as smooth as silk and then we had a hard time filling the time.  Looks like I'm going to have to find a way to get myself closer to the kid in me if I'm going to reach these little ones. 

The funny thing is that speaking to some seasoned professionals like our children's church leader as well as my mom, who's had many years experience I learned that even experts in the field can get a little thrown by some kids.  Honestly though I think these days in general we just have much bigger classes which makes everything more challenging.

Knowing that others have struggled with these same issues really helped me a lot as I was thinking that I was the only one and that its because I'm single and not around kids much, luckily this is not the case.  In life we are seldom alone with any problem and it helps to talk to others and get support. 

Bye bye locks

On my pamper day I decided it would be a good idea to do a big change and go from long to short hair, so it was bye bye locks. I've always enjoyed the feeling of seeing the hair disappear and a new look appear, it gives one a real boost of energy. Good thing is my hair grows fast, so it won't belong before the locks grow back.

I wish all changes in life were that simple. A chop here a snip there and walla! We are good as new! No, sorry it doesn't work like that. The most important changes in life come from systematic work and most importantly, a belief that we can change.

God knows this is possible and it one of the most fundamental parts of our spiritual journey, the journey of renewing the mind and growing in our knowledge of what Christ's salvation has done for us.

A few of my favourite things

To celebrate the end of lent and to rejoice in the new life that we have in Christ, I decided to spend the weekend doing a few of my favourite things.  What were they?  Art, gardening and a bit of time at a spa. 

Do I think Jesus would approve?  Most certainly!  Why?  Because if I'm not taking care of myself and my own spiritual well being, I can't take care of anyone else.....and that is what I desire most in life....to be strong for others so that when they are hurting, I can be there to hold them up! 

Growing in God means that as we grow and become stronger in God we need to turn back, hold out our hand and pick others up to where we are. 

So tired

This year has probably been the first time that I have spent so much effort focusing on lent and what this season means and for some reason tonight I feel really tired, but it is not a physical feeling but emotional one. 

I can never even begin to even imagine what Jesus felt that final hour he hung on the cross, but I know that He must have felt extreme exhaustion. As His life blood drained out of His body He would have known first hand how it felt to die as a human.  His Glory departed with those last gasps of air and Immanuel "God with us" was no more.......That is at least how it seemed to the human eyes watching Him. 

But we know better, we know how the story ends.....The resurrection, the power and the Glory of God manifest in magnificence in the resurrected Christ!  I want to encourage you this Easter weekend to focus and meditate on Christs final hours, His death and resurrection.  For in this amazing story lies the power of the faith we proclaim as Christians, our very existence and purpose of being. 

I wish you all a blessed and peaceful Easter weekend and for now I will drop offline for the next few days, for some final time of deep reflection.  You are in my heart, my thoughts and my prayers!

Shape of things to come

Oh I just love Autumn gardening.  The weather is just right, not too hot or too cold and I can push myself to get stuff done!  Love it!  It has taken me far longer than planned but I finally managed to finish reshaping the beds in the front garden, so now I can get stuck in with some new planting. 

Trying to plan what goes where is tricky and I have decided to make sure I plant shrubs and bigger plants that don't require finicky attention.  For ground cover it will all be herbs like parsley, or some more rocket or something like that. 

Planning for the future gives us direction and focus and can often help get us through difficult times in life when things seem hard.  I know that is what Jesus was doing throughout His trial, persecution and execution....focusing on the future, a future where we would be permanently united with God. 

Grazed

I'm sure you are as grateful as I am for another public holiday season with today being Human Rights day. I decided to spend the morning in bed with the kitties doing the computer work I normally do on Sunday nights.

This year I volunteered to play a very small part in setting up the 'Stations of the cross' display that normally takes place every Easter at our church. As I was wrapping the draping around the one metal cross on display I accidentally grazed my forehead on the one metal spike...ouch!

This got me thinking about the crown of thorns placed on Jesus head during His persecution. They were thick and poisonous thorns and I'm sure as the poison ran into the veins in His forehead, it must have swelled.

At that point in History there were no “Human Rights” and there were no global treaties protecting humanity and so torturers could do as they pleased and go unpunished. Today thankfully those treaties do exist, although they are often violated.

Jesus died to take the punishment for our sins and restore to us our humanity, so let us be thankful for His gift and continue to meditate on the work that the Cross of Christ has accomplished.

Extra extra - Read all about it!

You just can't get away from it, can you?  Everywhere you go you get bombarded with the "News".  From radio's, television, social media, word of mouth, you name it the news is everywhere.  And what does that make us do?  It gets out tongues wagging even more.

Well I can only imagine what it must have been like in Jerusalem when the news broke that this man, Jesus, to whom so many miracles had been attributed too, was going to go on trial, that must have caused a uproar! 

News has that way of gripping our attention, even when we don't want it too, but the good news is that there is one news story that you don't need to run away from.  No, instead, you would do well to run right at it, to chase it wherever it goes and that is the News that we are the redeemed children of God and that all who call upon the name of Jesus can and will be saved! 

Why flames dance

Have you ever wondered why flames dance?  Well I do.  I've tried googling all and many more and honestly can't find a solid answer, but some theories suggest that flames dance when there is insufficient oxygen for the flame to burn. 

Well our faith likewise cannot burn without the oxygen that the Holy Spirit fills our lungs with as we worship God.  And what do we have to do if we really want to fan those flames?  We need to fuel the fire with a passion for serving God with all our hearts.

When we have a fire and passion for God it will show one way or another.  Even in our darkest moments there will be something about us that others can't deny, something that sets us apart and that is when we will know that the passion and fire of God is burning strong within us. 

Hammering the nails

This weekend I completed my Easter art project and yes you probably guessed it was a cross.  This one is special to me though as while I have been working on it I have meditated on an area of my life I'd like to change. 

The final part was hammering in the nails with the fabric I draped across the bar.  My nails were small and thin yet with every blow of the hammer, I could feel the vibration through my hand, arm and whole body.  My thoughts turned to the Roman soldiers hammering human lives to a cross.  How hard must their hearts have been to strike those blows, hear the agonizing screams.....and take pleasure in it, to the point of playing games and rolling dice for their victims clothes. 

Yes these men were criminals and probably deserved to die, but not like this, but this is how the Romans chose to deter other criminals.  Living in South Africa though I wonder how much our hearts have become hardened to crime, we see it every single day on every news bulletin. 

This Easter I want to encourage you to ask God to show you areas in your life where you may have hardened your heart where you shouldn't have.  Ask God to heal you and place in you a spirit of compassion.

The other thief

Much is said about the thief who accepted Jesus offer of salvation, but not so much about the other guy.  I wonder why Jesus didn't try harder to convince this thief that life with Him would be worth more than any item he could have been accused of stealing.

Well I guess that has something to do with the fact that Jesus knew about the most important choice that God had given to Adam and Eve way back at the beginning of mankind's era on this earth.  He knew that God gave us a choice to choose to follow Him or not. 

The wonderful thing about celebrating the cross of Christ and His sacrifice for us every year is that we get an opportunity to make that choice afresh each year.