The Steps of prayer

Ginger loves going for walks and his favorite spot is down by our pool and Lapa area where we have a kids wooden jungle gym set up.  Sometimes while I accompany him I'll sit on the stairs and gaze over the valley and hills.  It is often here where I have some serious heart to heart prayers to God.

It is from here that I have prayed for my needs, my wants, my hearts desires, for miracles, for help for others, for emotional healing and the list goes on.

One thing that I have learned and believe is that God answers every prayer.  He just does it HIS way.

Whatever you are believing God for, I'd encourage you to find your spot, your place where you feel at peace and can talk to God.  From here raise your voice to God, silently or aloud and believe that God loves you infinantly more than you can imagine and that He will respond to your hearts cry. 

That one good thing

When I first started writing back in 2010 it was from a place of darkness and depression.  I realized that my moods and attitudes were my responsibility and as such I chose to pick myself up by the boot straps instead of expecting others to do it for me.  I decided to focus on one good thing that happened during the day and just give God thanks and praise for that by making that my focus of attention. 

Today I have been tired, too much playing last night, getting all creative...but there it is.  The desire to create has come back strongly within me and that has stirred my passion for writing once again and I am enjoying getting back to that commitment of spending time with myself, spending time with God in my thoughts and writing and in some small way spending time with you, my readers, those who choose to take the time to honour my efforts by giving me a moment of your time as I open my heart and thoughts to you. 

I have missed you, I have missed this special time each day to just say thank you to God for being my strength and my light in times when life is tough and there are many demands pulling me in different directions. 

So my one good thing today is you!  Thank you for walking this journey of life with me each time I share my heart.  You are special to God and you are special to me!

I do believe in Miracles

It must be over a year ago that my GP mentioned to me that she saw a perforation in my ear drum in my left ear.  I decided to take a wait and see approach, believing the perforation would seal and heal itself, believing that it was just a small tear.  In early January this year another visit to a doctor raised the issue again as the doctor asked, "Did you know you had a perforated ear drum?"  I said I had been told before but was hoping it would heal itself, to which I told, "No it won't, this one will need surgery." 

I tried ignoring the problem but over the course of the year I started noticing that my "good left ear" was now not hearing as well as the right one was and to put that in perspective as a child I had a bone transplant in my right ear and was told I would be permanently 20% deaf in that ear.  Naturally I now grew concerned and decided it was time to see an ENT.  

I saw one, explained my predicament and he advised that first step was a hearing test.  Once that was done and I returned to find out when we could operate, he asked if he had not treated an infection in my left ear yet, to which I said no.  It was at this visit however that I for the first time got to see inside my own ears as he had a new scope that allowed for this.  My shock was huge when I saw how large the hole in my eardrum really was. Nearly half the drum was missing.  

Long story short, some antibiotics, antihistamines twice a day and two nasal sprays later for 3 months, today it was time to go back to the ENT.  By now I had felt the positive effects of the medicine but was still doubtful as to whether we would get good news.  

Boy was I wrong.  Doc looked in my ear today and his surprise was audible.  Wow, he said, what a remarkable improvement.  The ear had cleaned out and all was looking well....and would you believe it, he said to me that the ear was busy healing itself and that there were now two holes as the ear had formed a bridge across the original tear.  I was shocked and at awe.  I asked him if he did not feel then that it would continue to do so, which he seems inclined not to believe right now, although he did confess that on 1 previous occasion with a young child he did see this happen.  

He cleared me for surgery.  Some arrangements will need to be made but if all goes well I'll have the surgery to repair the tear mid December.  

But Wow! How is it possible that our God can do such a miracle as to enable such a remarkable turn around that the ear is busy trying to heal itself, I'm truly gobsmacked and so.....

YES!  I do believe in miracles!

Lessons from my fire place

One of my biggest dreams prior to having my renovations done was that I always wanted a fire place.  Hence when the decision was made to renovate, that was non-negotiable.  Oh boy what a joy it has been to be able to use it for this, its first winter season. 

Well, I have been super surprised regarding the life lessons this little fire place is teaching me.  For starters, the day I first tried to crank it up I hit a major snag.  I had all my fuel bits in place and I got it started up, but within minutes, if not seconds of closing the door, I had smoke billowing out of it and my fire was instantly snuffed out.  Perplexed and frustrated I kneeled down and looked inside, something was missing.....I could not see the exhaust hole anywhere....Mmm, where had it gone? 

I poked my hands round the inside and figured out that there was a metal plate covering the hole right at the top.  Had it been placed there on manufacture, or some other time, I was not sure, but this plate was the cause of all the commotion and it had to go! 

Some more prodding round turned up the solutions, the side and back fire tiles were relatively easy to remove, which made room then for me to access the top plate.  After MUCH wiggling, jolting, prodding and pushing, the plate dropped out.  Right, now I was ready for round two, or actually three or four, but who's counting right... Lol!  Another go of it, with some swooshing of the news paper and my fire was on the go. 

In life we are often excited about a plan...this is going to be the big break, the big chance, the big opportunity I've been waiting for my entire life and we look again, and there is an obstacle in way.  The question is, are you going to let that obstacle stand in the way of your dream or are you going to push and prod and find a solution?  I believe God wants us to push hard and work for our dreams to come true.  Wasn't that the point of the departure from Eden, that man must toil and work.  I know there are many other ways to look at the story of Eden and many perspectives but I believe that God has declared in His word that when we put our hands to a job and we work with integrity and courage, that he will reward our efforts in every way. 

Well surprisingly there are many more lessons from my fire place to come, but for now, its nearly time to snuggle into bed.

Notre Dame is burning

I have taken lately to trying to avoid listening to the news as much as possible.  I absolutely hate negativity and the news displayed today is seldom good.  To my shock tonight I caught a glimpse of the headlines only to see that Notre Dame in Paris is burning. 

My heart sank, I thought back to my childhood and my own visit to that beautiful cathedral and all its wonders.  Building started in the early 1100's and was completed in 1345 and now this 674 year old building is burning to the ground.  What will be left of this iconic and historic building now only time will tell.  We will have to keep our ears open to see what the news brings next.

But is the Church of God world wide today not on on fire?  And this time I don't mean the fire of revival but the fire of destruction.  Money, greed, lust and other deadly sins are found in abundance and the true passion for God seems long lost.  I have witnessed the failure of passion in my own life and have realized that only by bringing about change will I be able to reignite the fire that burns within my soul for God and for sharing God with others.

What is burning in your life today, is it the fire of God as seen by Moses in the burning bush, or the fire of destruction that leaves lives in ruin?  We all will see fire in our lives, but it is our choice as to what or whom we burn for.  

Move that derriere

So I got a little cheeky.  I had my financial year end plans all mapped out and I was well on track.  Well that was until I lost sight of my own time tracking.  I got side tracked with business as usual and forgot about the year end financials.  Luckily I didn't wake up too late to my misadventure and I still have juuuuuuust enough time to pull the rabbit out the hat, so to speak.

Okay granted this is only my 2nd financial year end with the company so I can't be too hard on myself, but I am way more confident we'll have things ticking like clock work next year and this time I won't forget to do that one all important thing....set deadlines within deadlines.  Targets, goals, guidelines, we hear those words preached every time you attend a success seminar.  Right, ok, gotcha!

So do we have to have deadlines in our relationship with God....for the most part I'd say no, but we do have to be mindful of our relationship with Him and whether we are growing spiritually year by year.  How do you measure that?  Well, that's where the calendar does come in handy.  If you look back on your life a year ago and you can say, "Same  old, same old", chances are you're either on the wrong track or backsliding.  Ouch, that sounds harsh, but truth is if you're not moving forward with God then you are probably slipping. 

So how do we get our relationship with God back on track?  Well that goes back to the basics I've written about many times in the past.  Read your bible, pray, witness to others any way you can, stay in relationship wth other Christians and confess your sins (stay humble before God). 

When we keep referring back to those building blocks we'll be able to see if we are slipping behind or on track.  Good news is nobody else can guage for you how much, or how long or how often any of the above should take place, that is purely between you and God. 

So common, move your derriere.... LOL!

One extremely long day

It is seldom that so many challenges pop up in one day.  I was feeling emotional in the morning already, it was pay day, IT challenges kept me busy and we needed to start month end processes.  Its VAT deadline week and I really needed to get some shopping done.  There was a long list of emails to check, and boy, a bag full of paperwork that is just going to have to wait another day.

There are days when life just seems a little bit too much, yet at the end of it all I feel better tonight, exhausted, but better than I did this morning.  It is in life's chaos that I find meaning, the reason I'm here, the reason I am needed, when at times I feel desperately hopeless purely for a lack of feeling that my life matters for something. 

Then there is this, possibly my greatest purpose and maybe the only seed that I will leave on this planet once I'm gone.  My words, the tools of the trade of my heart are sometimes the only tools that I have to encourage others, encourage myself and if remotely possible, bring Glory to God. 

In my tiredness, my weakness and my frailty, God is mighty and strong.  He reminds me that it is in the times of life that we can't see Him working that He is doing His greatest work.  In these moments we see only in part, but when the mist clears and the fatigue fades and when others come along side us to raise our arms in worship to God once again, then we see His plan, His path and His purpose.

I pray today if you have struggled, that these words will lift you up, will encourage you and will strengthen you to know that you are not alone.  Others walk this path with you and more than that, God is right beside you!

Littlest hobo's

I was awoken this morning with the sound of plastic hitting the floor.  Not sounding too serious I decided to check it when I got out of bed.  When I descended the stairs I found a bowl of kitty food spilled all over the floor, this due to the food bowl being knocked off the box in the loft and falling down the stairs. 

Now I suspect the crime was committed by one of the many little furry hobo's that frequent my home on a regular basis.  Why just the other day I came home to find a kitty sitting on Topaz's favourite chair in my loft.  The sound of my arrival home didn't seem to startle it one bit.  It did have a hard time getting down the stairs past me and my hissing fur balls.

Makes me think, if little furry hobo's seem to enjoy my home, how welcoming are we to the other hobo's that cross our paths?  Well you might say you don't pick people up off the street on a regular basis but you entertain hobo's of heart, people who's lives are facing such challenges that they just need someone to talk too, someone to listen and understand what they are going through. 

This simple act of listening can be one of the greatest ways we can show Christ to people, to be His ears, His eyes, His hands and His heart to them in a physical way.  Being willing to say to someone, "Can I pray for you," could be the single most powerful act of love they will receive in that situation.  So next time someone starts chewing your ear off, before you get tempted to cut them off and run away, just think of them as God's hobo's sent to you that day and show them all the love you can!

Pressure pressure

I love my job and I love what I do.  Even though strong artistic tendancies reside within me, I still could not live without looking at numbers.......and yes I can hear some people just going Arrrgh, I can't think of anything worse.  The one tough thing about working with numbers though is that there is ALWAYS pressure.  I have yet to work in an accounting role and not face the daunting stress of deadlines.  The busier you are the busier you get. 

I wouldn't have it any other way though.  Take away too much work and I'll go nuts with boredom.  Being on the brink of insanity constantly keeps the juices flowing.  Yet in the midst of all of this, there has to be an island, a little spot where we can tuck ourselves away into a corner and just be....for me that's art and believe it or not, words are art too, they are the art of the soul and literary art is rich with imagination. 

Oh how I love to tell a story, to caste a picture or to bring back to life stories of old, and as I have committed myself to writing more regularly again, I can feel the call to throw myself in pure abandon to a world where words are my brush and I can paint the page blue without ever lifting a brush but to touch my keyboard. 

Stress fades, joy comes and peace flows when my keypad ticks away.  Knowing I can escape to this world brings great bliss and strength, strength to know that another day might come and go, and my time with my keyboard will roll around once more. 

God loves it when we find out island and he blesses our plans when we do, so I encourage you in the weeks to come to join me on this delightful journey again once more.

Load shedding or shedding the load

Our wonderful power utility provider/government are at it again....load shedding.  For the foreigners that's cutting our power because they SAY they can't handle the power requirements and need to cut power due to maintenance, and or that they don't have enough coal or they don't have enough money, etc. etc. etc. 

Now if this were true because only the poorest of the poor can't afford their electricity bill I think most South African's would cough up a bit extra, although I might be overly idealistic when I say that.  Truth is, they don't have us fooled.  We all know the real reasons for all the nonsense is corruption, greed, over bloated staff compliment, crazy bonuses, fraud, well the list is never ending really. 

This brings me to a principle my bosses are teaching us leaders, we need to help carry each others burdens, but not each others loads.  In other words, when someone has a real and genuine need then yes, by all means help.  But if someone is struggling because they are lazy, not focused, don't care or just plain negligent, then no, you're on your own to face the consequences.  

Is that scriptural though?  Jesus said, "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."  Matthew 11:28. But the lesson doesn't end there, verse 29 reads, "Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly of heart and ye shall find rest for your souls."  A yoke is a tool used to join two cattle as they pull a cart or other object like a plough.  So Jesus doesn't say dump your burden on me and relax, he says work with me, work the way I do and you will learn to find peace and strength in the trouble or difficulty you find yourself in.  He doesn't let us walk away from our troubles he carries them with us. 

This lesson gives me great comfort in life because I know that what Jesus is saying is, whatever effort you put into resolving your difficulties, I will match you effort for effort.  Are there times that God intervenes by miracles to get us to the other side of lifes problems, yes there are, but it's not the natural order of life. 

When we walk with God, we walk as partners in life, through everything!

What are you made of?

I am challenged daily by the decisions that people make and in my humanity I find it hard not to judge.  I question other peoples value systems and why they act the way they do.  The more I study it though, the more I realize that it is a matter of upbringing.  How we were raised determines a life time trajectory of decisions that we will make in our adult years. 

Proverbs 22:6 reads, "Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it."  Our parental duty is to make sure that we raise our children to do what is just and right before God, which is to walk in integrity in everything we do.  To train the child we must sometimes force them to do something that they don't necessarily want to do, but it is required to instill character in them.

So what are we to do if we weren't raised in a Christian home, with strong ethical and moral values?  Well I believe this next scripture tells us.  Micah 6:8 reads [Own emphasis added]  "He has shown you, O man, what is good; ...........And what the Lord requires of you????   BUT to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?"  In other words, it should be obvious; justice, mercy and humility must always walk hand in hand.

To not follow this guidance and Godly instruction in our lives, is to walk in rebellion towards God and God doesn't like rebellion.  He will use justice to work out all negative aspects of our behaviour.  Therefore we need to learn to submit to God and follow Him and then our path will be blessed. 

Sleeping Beauty

After two rough months of dealing with health issues, my body was just finished and exhaustion.  I went to bed early Saturday night, somewhere between 5-6pm, slept through most of the night without much disturbance, woke up around 6am thinking that I'd had enough sleep.  That didn't last long and after having breakfast I fell asleep again, waking round lunch time.  I dragged myself out of bed and had a shower and lunch and after a short walk lay down on the couch, only to fall asleep again.  This time when evening arrived I finally felt better. 

I think at times we forget that our bodies are not machines, we are not meant to be working at such a prolific pace that we never arrive at a place of feeling rested.   I wish I had a cats life, sleep for most of the day and have a short awake time early in the morning and then again in the afternoon or evening. 

Hebrews 4 tells us that there is a special kind of rest for the people of God.  It is called a Sabbath rest.  In modern day times we have lost the meaning of that word, Sabbath, but it refers to a complete, peaceful and total rest from all works.  When we learn to enter into the type of rest that God has created for us then we find ourselves in a complete place of peace and calm, knowing that God has all things in His mighty hands.  If God himself could rest without fear that His creation would fall apart, then we too can learn this kind of rest. 

I want to encourage you that whatever your circumstances are right now, you can still enter into the type of rest that God has created for you and find peace and strength in Him!

Steadfast and strong

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases
His mercies never come to and end
They are new every morning
Great is thy faithfulness of Lord

Life is hard, really hard and there are many challenges that befall us every day.  Some great and exciting, but hard nonetheless and others painful.  Sometimes the pain if of our own doing and other times it is just the nature of walking in a fallen world and then other times we know it is just pure evil busy attacking our soul.  Oft times we can be left feeling sore and bruised. 

Yet in all these difficulties God's word promises us that He never changes, he never waivers.  The beautiful chorus I have quoted above encourages us to live life in a new way.......No matter how hard today has been, God's mercy and grace are there waiting for us when we wake up every day.  When we have sinned and repented, He forgives us.  When we have been broken hearted, He is there to give us mercy and strength and above all else, He is steadfast, solid as a rock.

So whatever your trial, whatever your tribulation, whatever pain or sadness you may be feeling right now, allow the Holy Spirit to come and comfort you.  You may need to repent before God, or you may need His loving touch, whatever you need, come before the Lord in humility and prayer and give Him your everything. 

Positively speaking

I've been feeling angry tonight and tempted to get stuck in and rant and rave about the evil that is rife in our world today.  Yes I could stand on my soap box and bleat

and scream about how it all makes me sick to the pit of my stomach........But then I realize that this is not who I am.  I might have been there in the past, but not anymore.

When I look at my FB page I see humour, a fascination for nature, creation and the universe.  I see someone who delights in others successes and celebrates with those who find victory over life's challenges.  I remember a line from a blog I wrote years ago, which read, "the devil knows that as long as he can keep us looking down, we'll seldom look up to see how great God is."

Yes our God is great!  He is great in big and small ways, so today I want to praise Him for all the little things that have gone right in the last few days: 
- My boss finally caught my sense of humour and I enjoyed that tremendously!
- Our company month end run went successfully despite changes needing to be done. 
- I was able to successfully coach a colleague as to how to handle a very difficult and challenging day. 
- My kitties are having fun in life, even though I don't enjoy their little "gifts".  
- I have been able to spend time with a very precious friend. 

Yes, simple, good and positive things have happened in the last few days and for that, I am truly grateful.  God, you are Lord of all!  Nothing mankind can do is greater than your power and I need not fear anything!  

The windy road

In geometry we learn that the shortest route from point A to B is a straight line.  The question is, is it the quickest.  Now logic would suggest that this should be the case, but try that out in peak hour traffic and you'll quickly learn that it is not. 

Case and point my new route to work.  From where I live to the office park is on a relatively straight line, but that line happens to be Hendrick Potgieter drive.  Mmmm.  Not such a long distance, so I can't complain, but sit in that stream and a normal 15 - 20 minute drive can quickly turn to half an hour.  The junction where our office park is happens to be right in the bend of the offramp to the highway, Arrrgh! 

So along comes the windy road.  I never dreamt that this would be possible, but each time I try it, I beat my navigator by at least 5 minutes.  The windy road takes me on a short strip to just past Clearwater Mall, turn a left onto the route to my old office park, but duck a quick left again just before and I quickly reach a little back road on the top side of the mountain that takes me all the way to just behind the park.  Cross over the bridge and duck right and away we go and I'm in.

Now what does this have to do with our relationship with God.  Quite a bit.  Main line Christianity would teach us that there is a formula to developing our relationship with God when it comes to our quiet time.  I'll admit on the days I'm up early, that's great.  I especially love my new QT spot in my loft.  The sun comes steaming in through the red curtain and its a beautiful start to the morning.  Trouble is, I'm not a morning person.  Here comes the windy road bit.  How about I try that QT straight after feeding my kitties in the evening, seeing as their feeding station has now also been moved upstairs to the loft?  Bingo, job done.  A bit later in the day but no less effective and I enjoy it just as much, sometimes more because I'm not watching the clock.

So where will your windy road take you?  I have no idea and only you can complete the journey, but trust me, if you do, there's a whole new world of joy to discover in your relationship with God!

To sing a song

Over the last two months particularly I have been reminded about the true power of praise and worship.  On the night I received the Melanoma diagnosis I was drawn to the song, "Emmanuel" by Hillsong...Emmanuel, Jesus Christ, you never let me go!  My shepherd King, you're watching over me!  

What a beautiful encouragement, in every situation, in every storm, Jesus will never let us go.  God is watching over us, every fear, every tear, every nervous moment, every sickness, every surgery, every step we take from here till we walk into eternity with Christ, God is watching over us. 

That should fill us with such hope and strength!  And how amazing is it that we can now google any song and just listen to that one.  I must admit, when a song really speaks to me I do play it over and over again, just to let the words truly sink in.  This also allows the Holy Spirit to minister to me the specific words of hope, courage and faith that I need to get me through the night, day or season that I am walking through.

I want to encourage you, whether you are brushing your teeth, doing your make up, driving your car, having a meal or any other opportunity you feel down, find a praise or worship song to lift your spirit.  The true power in worship is that God Himself inhabits the praises of his people.  Meaning that when we praise Him, His true presence, the real and living God Himself, steps into your midst and touches you right where and how you need it.  No other God or man can do it quite like Him. 

So let God be God to you and sing a song to Him today!

Live

Being the chairperson of a complex, there is never a dull moment.  I had received a complaint that someone was getting shocked when they use their taps, which I found very odd.  Naturally I appointed an electrician to  come and have a look.  Turns out some pesky thieves have stolen the earth wire right out of the main city council box....fancy that!

My concern to the electrician is what is the worst that can happen...and apparently it is quite serious, electricution if you touch water and metal at the wrong point.... serious..very serious!  With no earthwire the complex is dangerously live.  I had to take measures to try and communciate the risk to all as quickly as possible. 

The risks of being "live" are quite dire indeed.  Makes me think though, if having and earthwire missing can make things dangerous, how dangerous can it be to be for us not to be deeply earthed in our relationship with Christ?  How shocking can we be to those around us and how much harm can we do?  I suspect the answer to that is exactly the same.... serious, very serious harm.

Being earthed in our relatioship with Christ is sometimes the only thing standing between us and a very shocking reality in our relationships with people, so best we find out who we are in Christ and find a way to keep ourselves connected to that which keeps us neutral and useful to God!

Sensitivity, good or bad?

We all have minor medical hiccups from time to time and Sunday was my turn.  Although I needed today to recover I wasn't going to let that defeat my fighting fit attitude.  Yes, the devil has had a run in with me lately but it simply isn't going to stop me.  

One thing that should stop me and make me think though is how do people perceive me.  Not that I take people's opinions to heart much, but sometimes we should stop and listen.  I have worked hard over the last year or so to change those attitudes and opinions in my career but one place I haven't worked on it yet is with regards to how I speak to the home owners in the complex I am chairperson of.

I have been seeing them as a nuisance to be chased away rather than an asset.  I got snappy with someone tonight and it wasn't necessary.  It is hard to stay focused and polite when people come across as argumentative and always complaining, but if the Holy Spirit is pointing this out to me then it is something that I need to be sensitive too and listen.

Sensitivity can be a very positive thing when it is used correctly.  It was sensitivity that helped me to pick up and spot the melanoma in time to have it removed successfully before it could do any damage....and that's the right way to use it.  Being overly sensitive and agitated with people all the time is not the right way to use it. 

As I humble myself before God and ask him to heal me of my negative sensitivity.  If this is an are that you feel you need help with too, ask God to forgive you and to give you strength and insight as to how to change it.

Say thanks to the billy goat

I looooove coffee!  And to make ATU an even better place to work, our bosses bought us a delightful coffee machine which we are all now allowed to use (as opposed to being saved for guests).  Legend has it that a goat herder noticed his goats getting hyperactive after chewing on little red beans.  He later tried it himself with the same effect.

To cut a long story short it wound up in monasteries where the monks would chew it to stay awake during long prayer sessions.  Some priests apparently got mad at the idea and threw them in the fire, only to be rewarded with a delightful smell.  Thought came to them to try filtering it through water like tea and thus our roast coffee drink was born.  There are other legends around its origins, but I quite like this one.

You see in order for us to obtain any benefit out of the word of God whatsoever we truly need to chew into the meat of the word of God.  As we spend time mulling it over and over, the best flavours and aromas are released, so to speak, and the Holy Spirit enlightens us to the true meaning and that's when we gain the true benefit. 

So can I encourage you to make a cup of coffee, relax and get tucked into some scripture and chew/grind it out until you gain  its full portion for your life.

Carry me

January 7th...Well I could say my year started with a bang, but to put it more accurately it ended with one.  December was a month long heat wave right until the last few days of the month when the rain decided the pour and pour some more.  My mom was visiting for a few days so I was desperately trying to steal a few days away from my normal hum drum to be with her.

Enter 31 December, year end ...finally and nothing can go wrong except the fireworks...right?  Wrong.  Our complex wall along a main road collapsed with the heavy rain.   Eish!  Luckily I checked and insurance would cover some additional security and not being able to do much else with everything being closed, I left it at that.  Now its a mile of paperwork to submit to insurance.

Work started off quietly (thank goodness) but now its back to its normal busy pace, but for that I'm grateful, I do like a busy work day, it makes the time fly.

But then today I had some other disturbing news about one of our complex's staff members and trying to wade my way through the truth and the lies will be a mission. 

So do I think 2019 is going to be a quite year, not at all, but one cry I had in my heart tonight as I sat eating my dinner was, "Carry me God".  Right now I have faith that all will come right and be well, but I need your supernatural strength, so carry me, I can't do it on my own. 

Renevatio

Over the last few weeks my heart has been bursting as I have been preparing to begin writing again.  It is with great joy that I get back to my favourite hobby and my prayer as always is that you will join with me in walking every day with God. 

Renevatio - the Latin word meaning renewal, renewing, refinancing and or renovation.  That is precisely what 2018 will be remembered as for me.  I faced yet another water leak inside the walls of my upstairs bathroom, that became so bad that my entire kitchen ceiling (which is a concrete slab) was soaked through, leaving water dripping down both side walls.  This resulted in the entire top row of my kitchen cupboards being destroyed.  After months of prayer I decided to tackle a task I've been wanting to do for many years and not just repair the one row of cupboards but rather use the opportunity to renovate the entire downstairs section of my apartment and build in a loft.  In future blogs I'll most likely share the stories and lessons that came from this time period, but the result has been a completely transformed home and one that I am incredibly happy in right now. 

That's not all that changed, after the change in job in 2017, 2018 proved to be a year of growth and transformation in my career and I'm completely at peace with the new trajectory of where my life is headed.  I can only pray that God will preserve me where I am and continue to bless the path I am on in submission to the leaders he has placed over me. 

Over the past year and various circumstances I learned that the depth and strength of my relationship with God does not lie in what I do, how I serve or don't serve or whom I am associated with, but purely by the grace of a loving God who chooses to allow me to walk with him in honesty, being real in every moment and in the faith that has been buried deep in my soul through, scripture, love and teaching.

It was a difficult and tough year, but one that bore much fruit and just when I thought I was set to coast home to Christmas I received news that would jolt my thinking, but thankfully not my faith.  On 1 December (Saturday) I noticed a small but irregular spot on my leg that did not look like any of the other beauty spots that God has so graciously placed all over my red headed body.  I photographed and enlarged it and noticed a small nucleus that did not look good.  On a hunch I googled photo's of Melanoma's and realized that this might be one.  I emailed my doctor immediately with my suspicions and she replied the next day (surprisingly on a Sunday) that I should come in immediately and have it taken out and tested. 

On 3 December it was removed and a week later I received confirmation of a positive diagnosis for melanoma but fortunately for me it was a stage 0 cancer, meaning we caught it on time.  A wider incision was necessary to retest the area to confirm that it is removed successfully, which was done last week Friday and I await the result. 

My faith in God is not shaken in the least, I know that my God has given me victory over this disease and I will walk whatever path I need too, to ensure that all stays well and that I fight and beat it on every level. 

My God is my victory!!!  That is my declaration as I face some uncertainty right now to do what is necessary to ensure that I follow all processes to take control over that which the devil seeks to use to destroy me...... He doesn't stand a chance! 

So as I walk through this wonderful new year of 2019, I pray that you will join me to walk by faith and walk in the victory of what Christ has already overcome on the cross of Calvary on my behalf. 

V.I.C.T.O.R.Y