Fighting monkey's

There are times in life when any soul feels sad, but under normal circumstances one can shake those emotions fairly quickly. Depression is a different monkey all together. Depression hooks onto whatever negative emotions you might be feeling, like anger, pain or loss and drags you down the well until all you see is darkness.

I have written several times before about my own trials with depression and I'll admit that this last week has been particularly difficult. Last night as I wept before God feeling that final decent to the bottom of the pit, I felt the Holy Spirit saying to me, “you need to fight this one on your own this time.” It is not that God was leaving me to my mess but rather that I needed to awaken the soldier in me and fight for my right to freedom.

At that moment strength arose and the Word of God rose within me. As I spoke God's word and claimed God's promises over my life, my strength was renewed. I would love to say that today was a walk in the park, it wasn't but it certainly was better. Then this evening in the silence of the night those monkey's came tugging at me again. This time I chose a different weapon. I have a few DVD's that I have purchased and hang on to because they speak to me about the strength of the inward spirit and renew my mind with a will to go one once more.

I truly hope that bearing my soul tonight in vulnerability to all will help somebody! If you are in the bucket right now and you feel yourself being lowered into a pit of darkness, reach for the walls and dig your nails in. Look up! See the light of God, speak the word and start climbing! I pray God's peace and strength be with you!