Getting ready to say goodbye to 2015 is difficult. It has been an incredibly tough year. At the start of this year I declared that it would be my 'Lion heart' year, but I had not defined what that meant. Looking back now I see that it was a year of tremendous personal growth that was brought about by having the courage to to allow myself to dream big, try new things and allow myself to really feel love, joy, sadness, grief and all the other wonderful emotions that life causes us to feel.
I took the bold move to join and art group for the first time ever and made some wonderful friends, but more so after starting on familiar territory with beading, I challenged myself to learn to paint and that has been the biggest blessing in my life this year!
After declaring at the end of 2014 that I really wanted to adopt a child, I took steps to find out about what that would mean. I read books, spoke to families that have adopted and even joined our church's children's ministry to spend time with little ones to see how I'd cope. I have reached the end of that journey knowing that I truly am ready, willing and emotionally and physically able to do so, but right now just don't have the means to do this right now. I have given the dream to God and believe that He will bring things to pass in His time! Zachariah and Elizabeth taught me that God's timing is His doing and that I have no right to question that. God will do in my life as He sees fit and if I am willing to receive the gift at His appointed time, it will be a blessing!
As would be expected, this year brought with it many challenges. Health difficulties, house repairs and car trouble all put me under pressure one way or another, but God is good and has brought me through each trial!
This year our country has faced drought and in some parts this still persists, so spending time in the garden this year has been very limited and I haven't seen the development that I would have liked to achieve.
But without doubt the hardest part of this year was saying goodbye to my Grandmother, Gran Babe Smith! She had faced health challenges of her own early on in the year and when I went to see her last in April, I had a strong sense that this may well be the last time we got to spend time with one another. Sadly she passed at the end of October. It has been a particularly hard part of this years journey especially for her children.
Despite the heart ache and challenges I know that I have reached the end of this year stronger, more focused and more determined about my calling, knowing that God has more in store. I know too that this will mean digging really deep for every ounce of strength, being willing to make drastic changes to my life and being totally open and dependant upon the Holy Spirit for guidance in the year ahead.
What has this year meant to you? I would encourage you to take the time to reflect over the next few days so that when the bell tolls 12 at midnight on December 31st, you'll be ready to wave goodbye to 2015 and say with me:
Our God is an AWESOME God who REIGNS from heaven above, with WISDOM power and LOVE, our God is an Awesome God! I praise you at the end of this year Lord, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made and my days before you are numbered and you have a plan and a purpose for my life!
So long and goodbye 2015! See you all next year!
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